the X factor –=Every Little Thing =–

but somehow i just thought the thing through… i also duno how or why… it’s just like im suddenly inspired by something (which i duno what it is…) or something just brightening up in my mind…

sometimes when ur heart is peaceful n quiet enuff, you can actually see further and clearer… there is one chinese idiom to describe this: 『宁静致远』

i think now my heart is just in this status…

i can finally move on liao, i think…

sometimes i questioning myself… do i really love her? or yet she is just the nearest?

i duno…

i only konw that…

everytime i think about the truth that it’s impossible to be with her, some unidentifiable pain flows out of the bottom of my heart and fills it up until it’s full, then overflows, then floods all over with the blood, slowly slowly…

 
from the internet
 
世界有很多颜色
我叫蓝色
但是我有一天终于明白
任何颜色最后都逃不过一个命运…
成为灰色
灰色的世界
灰色的蓝…

turn to gray

心变成了灰色的

so it’s here

不知道什么时候才会醒来

fade away…

looking at her face, just one sight

只是看上她一眼，所有想要离开的企图和决心，马上变得无比的脆弱，马上消失的干干净净…

可是不管怎样，还是要离开啊…

but im fine…心也从来没有这么平静过…

…
i can’t take my eyes off you
i can’t take my mind off you
till the day i leave
till i find somebody new
…

Damien Rice - The Blower’s Daughter

And so it is
Just like you said it would be
Life goes easy on me
Most of the time
And so it is
The shorter story
No love, no glory
No hero in her sky

I can’t take my eyes off you
I can’t take my eyes off you
I can’t take my eyes off you
I can’t take my eyes off you
I can’t take my eyes off you
I can’t take my eyes…

And so it is
Just like you said it should be
We’ll both forget the breeze
Most of the time
And so it is
The colder water
The blower’s daughter
The pupil in denial

I can’t take my eyes off you
I can’t take my eyes off you
I can’t take my eyes off you
I can’t take my eyes off you
I can’t take my eyes off you
I can’t take my eyes…

Did I say that I loathe you?
Did I say that I want to
Leave it all behind?

I can’t take my mind off you
I can’t take my mind off you
I can’t take my mind off you
I can’t take my mind off you
I can’t take my mind off you
I can’t take my mind…
My mind…my mind…
‘Til I find somebody new